


Duck, Duck, Dominator

by decobray



Category: DuckTales (Cartoon 2017), Wander Over Yonder (Cartoon)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-11
Updated: 2018-09-21
Packaged: 2019-07-11 00:11:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,178
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15960542
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/decobray/pseuds/decobray
Summary: When a notorious intergalactic menace crash lands in Duckburg, local evil sorceress Magica De Spell sees her as a potential tool with which to gain revenge. Lord Dominator has her own schemes, but neither of them could have ever planned for the most monstrous outcome of their alliance: feelings.





	1. Duck Amuck, Dom Aplomb

Another glass vial shattered on the kitchen floor, purple fumes spilling from it in large vaporous streams. The stove fan, which was switched on high, did little to deter the hazy cloud from reaching the smoke alarm, which began to set off a loud irritating chirp every second or so. Coughing and spluttering as a bit of the fumes entered her nose and mouth, Magica ran to the window and threw it open, hoping that the cloud would disperse before any of the other tenants in the apartment complex became concerned. She then climbed upon a chair and fiddled with the smoke alarm for around two minutes, finally just removing the batteries to keep it from making that infernal noise.

  
“To think that I, Magica De Spell, the queen of shadows, would be reduced to this,” she moaned as she hopped off the chair, nearly falling on her face in the process.

  
“If only I still had my magic, I'd turn Scrooge McDuck and his entire family into nothing but stains on the floor of his oversized mansion!” the witch said, kicking the chair over. “But they had to ruin everything! Curse Scrooge, curse Donald, and curse those obnoxious little triplets! What were their names? Humphrey, Dumphrey… Ah, it doesn't matter!”

  
Magica walked over to the countertop, where she had been sorting through various mystical vials. She picked one up and briefly admired its iridescent green coating, adding a gorgeous sheen to the black liquid within.

  
“But most of all… Curse that tiny little loudmouthed brat with the pink bow, who had the audacity to lay a hand on me, ME!” Magica’s eyes widened in rage as she squeezed the bottle so tight it began to crack.

  
“She actually thought it was a good idea to cross the most powerful dark force of this age, for a mere shadow! Absolutely pathetic,” Magica hissed, tossing the green vial out the window without even looking at it.

  
She heard it shatter, and a moment later a car alarm went off as the vehicles owner began to scream. Not even bothering to look at the commotion, the witch slammed her window shut.

  
“Well, it doesn't matter,” she said, taking a few deep breaths to calm herself. “All I need to do is create a new amulet and exact my horrifying revenge on Scrooge’s entire family, and then also destroy his friends and acquaintances for good measure.”

  
Magica began to let out a throaty villainous laugh when she was interrupted by a banging noise coming from below her.

  
“I've told you five times already to cut that out! It’s loud and annoying and my baby just fell asleep!” The tenant below her shouted, continuing to hit his ceiling with a broom handle.

  
“Your worthless infant should be thankful that it gets to hear the wonderful sound of my evil gloating!” she yelled back, stomping her foot.

  
The sorceress sighed and flopped down on the old couch she had picked up off the street, which after countless potion treatments and attempted cantrips still smelled somewhat like pickles. Most of the things in her apartment were used, either given away by people moving out of the building or picked up at a secondhand store. In all her years of evil-doing before she had been imprisoned in Scrooge’s dime, Magica had never been forced to live like this. Her lair across the ocean had been foreclosed on during the time she had spent trapped in the currency her arch-enemy wore around his neck, and all of her assets had been seized, leaving her penniless.

  
“Come on, it’s not that bad. You could still be reduced to a shadow, following around your ungrateful fake niece, constantly nagging her about freeing you from a tiny piece of silver...” Magica muttered out loud. She rolled onto her side and glanced at the wall across from the couch, scarcely decorated and with peeling wallpaper. An ornate old clock hung at the center of the wall, the only decent thing she could find at the nearby thrift store. As she watched the pendulum swing, Magica suddenly realized that it was six o’clock, the time her shift at the diner started.

  
She leapt off the sofa and ran to the closet in her bedroom, slipping out of her black dress as quickly as possible while she did so. Her uniform hadn’t been washed in a few days and had a large grease stain on the white apron part, but she had no time to be bothered by it. After putting on her work clothes Magica donned a blonde wig, so none of the McDuck clan would recognize her if they happened to wander into the restaurant where she worked. Once she was dressed, she grabbed her bag and rushed out the door.

  
“Of all the evil beings in the universe, why me?” Magica said as she descended the stairwell, “I bet none of the other forces of darkness are having even half as bad of a day.”

 

* * *

 

“Oh, FLARP this stinking galaxy!” Lord Dominator shouted as another meteor hit her Orbble, causing her to careen towards the opposite direction of where she had been trying to float. The bubble in which she was encased had taken a lot of damage in the past few hours, and she wasn’t sure how much longer it would hold. First a comet had propelled her what felt like a couple of lightyears, then she had narrowly dodged being pulled into the gravitational pull of an absolutely massive gas giant of a planet, and now she was dealing with the worst meteor shower she had ever seen.

  
“I miss my old galaxy, it was so much smaller, friendlier, easier to destroy… it’s not faaair,” Dominator whined. “If only I had my ship, then I could travel back there and see all those lovable dorks again, visit the new planets they were growing, and CRUSH THEM ALL in my ruthless inescapable grasp!.”

  
She mimed ripping the heads off the imaginary characters before her, laughing maniacally as she did so. Once she had her ship, her armor, and her army, the losers that had somehow managed to defeat her would be torn to shreds and utterly obliterated. She would make that simpering happy-go-lucky freak Wander watch in horror as she burned away his friends to nothing, dissolving their flesh and bones in her dripping molten claws. Oh, how satisfying it would be to hear them scream, especially that idiot Lord Hater. How he had managed to thwart her final attack was still completely beyond her, but he wouldn’t stop her the second time around.

  
Lord Dominator closed her eyes and blissfully imagined her desired revenge, giggling contentedly at the idea of annihilating the morons who had ruined her life. She was so preoccupied with her fantasy that she failed to notice an extremely large meteor careening directly towards her. It collided with her Orbble and nearly popped it, sending the alien flying at an extremely high speed towards a blue and green planet in the distance that had somehow completely escaped her view.

  
Once she stopped screaming, Dominator reassessed her situation. “Okay Dee, you can use this to your advantage,” she said to herself. “That planet looks like it could be inhabited, which means it might have resources you can use to construct a device that’ll let you get back to doing what you love: leaving entire galaxies gray and devoid of life in a twisted mockery of the miracle of their creation!”

However, as she neared the planet’s atmosphere, the villainess began to feel like even she was a bit out of her depth. The sphere before her was at least fifteen times larger than the biggest planet in the galaxy she had recently left, though not nearly as big as some of the other planets she had encountered in this particular solar system. If it was populated by sentient life forms (and judging from the satellite she had just passed, it was), then there would be far more living things on the surface of the planet than she was used to dealing with, and she didn’t even have her armor to protect her.

  
Still, it was nothing she couldn't obliterate, given enough time. The Orbble barely managed to stay intact as it began to penetrate the ozone layer, white hot flames surrounding the bubble as it raced towards the surface of the planet. Dominator could see vast grids of lights and structures below her, confirming that the population had access to electricity at the bare minimum, and likely even more advanced technology. Of course, the villainess was sure that nothing the locals had created would measure up to her ingenious inventions.

  
Most other people would be in awe of the spectacle of the emerging blue sky and white clouds springing from below the darkness of space, but Lord Dominator didn't care much for the aesthetics of natural beauty. She was busy formulating how to manipulate the resources of the world that was opening up in front of her as she fell, plotting how to subjugate its people and destroy them when they outlived their usefulness. Her slight trepidation over the size of the planet was nothing compared to her determination to see it left as nothing more than a bleak lifeless shell.

  
Dominator’s eyes lit up as she once again fantasized about ruining the lives of countless miserable dorks, watching them sob as they knelt before her. She could feel a rush of excitement as she got closer and closer to the surface, a city by the ocean appearing as a small cluster, growing bigger by the second. Soon she would be back in her element, terrorizing other living things. She shivered in delight, her mouth a terrifying ear-to-ear grin.

  
“Yeah, come to mama! I'm Lord Dominator! I'm the most vile, most evil, most powerful being in the universe, and this big dumb mudball is about to learn what it means to be DOMINATED! BWA HA HA H-”

  
The Orbble was rammed for a final time by a winged flying machine that had come out of nowhere, popping on impact with barely a sound. Dominator was cut off mid-laugh as she slammed against the glass of the cockpit. She vainly tried to dig her fingers into the machine to keep from sliding off and continuing her fall without the protection of her Orbble, but she was unable to keep her grip for more than a second.

  
“GROP,” Dominator shouted, flailing uselessly and angrily as she continued her unrestrained plummet towards civilization.

 

* * *

 

“Launchpad, what in the blazes did we just hit?” Scrooge McDuck asked. He was used to his pilot colliding with all a manner of things, but usually not on a clear day with such an empty sky.  
“Not sure, Mr. McDee,” the incompetent aviator replied. “My guess? Probably a skydiving lizard or something.”


	2. Close Encounters

“Excuse me, waitress, my steak is well done,” a diner patron said as Magica walked by the table, carrying an order of drinks. She rolled her eyes and turned to address the man with as much false cheerfulness as she could muster.

“Is there something wrong with that?” She asked, her left eye twitching slightly as she forced a smile.

“Well yes, I ordered it medium rare,” the man replied.

“Oh, I'm SO sorry, let me get that fixed for you,” the witch said, grabbing the plate.

She walked into the kitchen, which smelled like old breakfast food and oil, and was about to speak with one of the cooks when she noticed the clock. It was ten thirty: quitting time. Magica breathed a sigh of relief as she dumped the steak dinner and the drinks she was holding into the trash, the glasses shattering as they hit the bottom of the container. No one else in the kitchen bothered to look up from what they were doing, glass breaking was an extremely common noise at the diner.

As Magica went to punch her time card and leave the restaurant, a weak throat-clearing sound caught her attention. It was her boss; Tim. He was a short and nervous looking dog whose spectacles were always sliding down his face, and he spoke rather quietly.

“Uh, Maggie, a word?” He said, wringing his hands.

Magica clenched her fists and slowly turned around, trying her best to maintain a pleasant facial expression. This cowardly little pug was the worst part of working at the horrid grease trap of a restaurant she had been consigned to. To think that she, the queen of shadows, was taking orders from a sniveling runt like this. A revolting concept that was unfortunately currently a reality.

“Listen, um, you keep coming in late and our customers say you’re a bit rude,” Tim continued, not looking her in the face. “And you don’t keep up with orders, and you break a lot of things that I have to pay to replace. I guess what I’m trying to say is-”

His words were sucked back into his throat as he began to claw at his throat, which was held in Magica’s tight grip. She wasn’t at all muscular, but she had more than enough strength to subdue the pathetic wimp before her. He gazed into her eyes in utter fear as she removed her wig, shaking her head and letting her purple-streaked raven hair fall into place.

“Listen to me you insignificant vermin, I’m MAGICA DE SPELL, dread sorceress of the shadows. I’ve ruined more lives than your tiny brain could even comprehend, raised demons and conjured creatures from the darkest depths of your worst nightmares, and fought heroes so mighty you’re not worthy to even THINK their names,” She squeezed tighter and Tim’s face began to turn blue, tears streaming down his face.

“I guess what I’M trying to say is that if you fire me, I will curse your lineage so hard that your children’s grandchildren will lay awake in the night, shivering and screaming, as my black magic eats away at their warmth and happiness from the inside like a writhing mass of worms,” Magica released her hand and watched in satisfaction as he sunk to his knees, coughing harshly. “So... you know. Do whatever you want though.”

Once he could breathe again, Tim scurried out of reach as quickly as he could. The panic on his face was plain as day as he considered pulling out his phone and calling the police, but then he glanced at the witch standing before him, arms crossed and eyes wide, and his nerve left him completely.

“O-of course I wasn’t going to fire you, Magg- uh, Magica!” Tim said. “Uh, in fact, how about a… a raise? And take the rest of the week off!”

“And you’ll have the good taste to not mention this conversation to anyone, right?” she said, her eyes narrowing.

“N-no one, not at all! Just between us!”

“Now wasn’t that a productive employee-employer chat? I’m glad we had this little talk. See you next week!” Magica said as she left the restaurant, slamming the door behind her.

 

As soon as she was outside, the witch finally allowed herself to breathe and relax her shoulders. Intimidating people came naturally to her, but without her magic she had been afraid that even a pushover like Tim could have called her bluff. Fortunately, the encounter had worked out in her favor, and she had several days of free time with which to collect ingredients and concoct potions. Maybe she would even search for a magic enhancing artifact or two.

Magica pulled out a to-do list as she walked down the badly lit street that led back to her apartment complex, looking over the items she had written down as she mentally planned out the rest of her week.

“Ooh, I need to add something,” she said to herself, pulling a pen from the pouch on her uniform. “Curse… Tim.”

Magica allowed herself a brief evil laugh, not particularly caring whether or not anyone heard her. It had been far too long since she had been able to villainously monologue to someone and have them quake in terror before her, and being able to do so was quite revitalizing. Putting the pen and paper away, Magica was about to turn the corner when she noticed a figure crawling along the sidewalk on the opposite side of the street. It was hard to make out exactly, but it seemed have green skin and was wearing ragged black clothing.

“A homeless lizard…?” The witch pondered, deciding to wander over towards the strange being. Magica was always open to tormenting a hapless unlucky soul, and it seemed like she had just found one.

However, as she got closer, Magica could see that this was no lizard. While she did have a somewhat reptilian appearance, the woman struggling on the pavement before her didn’t have a tail, and rather than a crest, she had a shock of asymmetrical white hair coming from the top of her head. Perhaps most intriguing were her ears, which protruded from her head and were long and pointy. If Magica had to guess, she was probably a goblin or some other similar kind of creature who had been summoned from the depths. She looked injured too, which provoked further curiosity.

“You, crawling green thing,” the witch said, gesturing to the odd woman she had found. “Who summoned you? Who in Duckburg, besides myself, has the magical expertise to conjure a goblin?”

 

* * *

  


Lord Dominator was aware that the avian lady who had just approached her was talking, and she was fairly sure she had been addressed as a “thing” and a “goblin”, but she was too tired and thirsty to really care about what the rest of the sentence meant. The universal translator nanochip she had inserted in her own brain decades ago made it so that she could both understand and speak any language in the universe, but in her current state words were difficult.

It was nothing short of a miracle that she had survived the crash onto the surface of the planet, though just about anybody who knew her would consider her survival the opposite of a miracle. She had been able to keep herself from reaching terminal velocity after her Orbble had been destroyed, and she had landed in the water and not on the land, which certainly would have killed her. Dominator still felt like she had cracked or broken several bones upon impact, and it had been a near impossible challenge to swim to shore. She had accomplished it, but the task had left her near completely drained. Hours had passed as she crawled through the woods beyond the beach and into civilization, where the first sentient being she encountered was currently right in front of her, dressed in some kind of waitress uniform.

She looked up at the feathered, black haired woman who was standing over her and babbling something about sorcery. Her eyes were large and had a sickly yellow gleam, her pupils black reptilian slits. In her exhausted and delirious state, Dominator found them quite beautiful.

“You… eyes…” she said weakly, pointing up at the duck’s face.

“Excuse me? What about my eyes? I’m trying to ask you some questions here, you lowly hellspawn!” the woman replied, sounding more annoyed than actually angry.

This was a genuinely scary experience for the intergalactic conqueror, she had never felt more powerless. If this stranger chose, she could easily end her life with a few quick blows, or even worse, leave her to die of dehydration. But she still had her pride, and she wasn’t about to let some anthropomorphic bird creature insult her.

“Can’t… talk to me like… that… ‘m Lord Dominator…” she managed to croak out. Dominator feebly tried to throw a punch, but only managed to lightly brush the duck’s leg with her hand.

“What’s that supposed to mean? You’re some kind of important demon or something? Look, if you’re trying to intimidate ME, Magica De Spell, master of dark magics, you’re going to need to be a little more terrifying than a half dead goblin who can’t even stand up,” the woman, who was apparently named Magica De Spell, said smugly.

Since it was now obvious to Lord Dominator that she wasn’t going to be able to hurt or scare Magica in any way, and at this point she actually felt the cold terror of her own death creeping up behind her, she decided to do something she had never done before in her entire life: ask another living thing for help.

“Need… water…” she whispered, tugging on Magica’s skirt. “Treat… my injuries… you idiot….”

The sorceress scoffed and rolled her eyes in response. “You’re in no position to be insulting me, you know that right? Besides, why would I bother to save you when you haven’t demonstrated that you’d be of any use to me? I’m a very busy woman and I have a lot of revenge stuff to plan, I can’t waste my time nursing a pathetic creature like you.”

That was the last straw. Dying or not, nobody called Lord Dominator pathetic. Using the last of her strength, the alien warlord forced herself to her feet, swaying back and forth precariously. Her eyes snapped completely open, totally bloodshot and even redder than they naturally were. Her mouth drew back in a snarl exposing her gritted teeth, two of which were missing.

“You listen to me, you two bit bad guy I’ve never even heard of,” Dominator growled, pointing at Magica, who looked somewhat alarmed. “I’m LORD DOMINATOR! I destroyed an ENTIRE GALAXY’S worth of worlds, and this dumb planet is next! You’re NOTHING compared to me, you’re like an insect, and you better do exactly what I say, or I’ll… I’ll…”

She teetered forwards, losing all control of her legs. Unable to stop herself, Dominator fell into the arms of the duck standing in front of her. The witch was stiff and awkward, clearly unused to holding anyone in this manner, but still far more comfortable against her body than the cold rough ground.

“I’ll destroy you…” she whispered, before she faded from consciousness and into a deep sleep.

 

* * *

  


Magica totally surprised herself by catching the green girl when she fell, it wasn’t something she had planned on doing at all. Helping others was at the bottom of her list when it came to things she was good at, but here she was; supporting the body weight of a strange creature as she slept on her shoulder. This Lord Dominator had even gone so far as to threaten her despite her feeble countenance, which she found more amusing than anything.

“Okay, so she’s from space, not the underworld, and she claimed to have destroyed entire planets,” Magica said to herself as she looked at the sleeping alien. “If she’s really capable of such cosmic destruction, maybe she can be useful to me after all…”

The sorceress donned a devious grin as she picked Lord Dominator up in her arms and began to walk the final few blocks towards her apartment. Of all the fiendish monsters and creeping terrors Scrooge McDuck would expect Magica De Spell to throw at him, she was sure that he would never, in a thousand years, be prepared for a planet-busting alien. Since it was so late at night, there was no one around paying attention to her carrying said extraterrestrial either, which meant that she could take the elevator rather than the stairs.

“Oh Dommy, if you really are as evil as you claim to be, you’re going to be quite a nasty surprise for my old friend Scrooge. Really, I can’t wait to test you out,” she chuckled as she kicked open the door of her apartment, which she had forgotten to lock, and walked inside. “Oof, hang on, you’re too heavy.”

Magica dropped the other woman like a sack of potatoes as she bent over and put her hands on her knees, panting.

“I hope that didn’t kill her,” the witch said, looking at the motionless alien on the floor. “Ah, she’s probably fine.”


	3. The Pact

“Well that's silly, everybody needs somebody,” Wander said, his voice echoing all around the inner sanctum of Lord Dominator’s spacecraft. 

“SHUT UP! BE QUIET! STOP TALKING!”

Dominator struggled to free herself, but her limbs were encased in her own cooled lava, and the hardened surface wouldn't budge. She was trapped on her own throne, and none of the systems in her ship were responding to her voice. Even her bots merely stood motionless, staring at her with blue unblinking eyes. She hadn't designed them with blue eyes, why did they have blue eyes?

“Everybody needs somebody, but you don't have anyone. You're all alone,” the orange alien continued, walking closer to her. “You're not evil, you're just a bully, because you don't have anyone who cares about you.”

“I’M not EVIL? I OBLITERATED your whole stupid galaxy! I ripped the happiness out of millions of life forms! I, I… I flarpin’ chased you across a solar system just to kill a dumb little flower because I wanted to upset you! How am I not evil? I'm the most evil thing alive!” Dominator shouted.

“So you had kind of an… extreme way of asking for attention,” Wander said. “But you were so lonely you wanted people to feel anything towards you, even if it was fear or anger. You didn't know how to be nice because no one was ever nice to you, and by the time I got the chance to try and be your friend, it was too late.”

Wander floated up in the air, hovering around the woman, who shook with rage at the sight of his dopey, sad face. 

“Living things need other living things in their lives, whether you want to admit it or not. You can't keep going like this.”

“Shut up,” Dominator hissed. “Even if I did need someone else in my life, which I don't, it wouldn't be a simpering little goody two-shoes DORK like you, or your lame friends! I LIKE hurting other people, and it's not because I need their attention! I think it's fun!”

“You know, it's easier to make friends with people who share your interests,” Wander said as he started to disappear, fading into the same black mist that Lord Dominator’s entire ship was turning into.

The hardened lava encasing her evaporated at the same time her throne did, going up in a puff of smoke. The swirling haze enveloped the alien completely, until the murky darkness was all she could see as she swam through it, her limbs feeling like they were trying to freestyle through molasses. Before she could really get anywhere, Dominator began to dissolve as well, watching with relative calm as her body disappeared into the mist, starting with her feet.

“What the Grop…?” Dominator said quietly as she opened her eyes, finally awake after thirteen straight hours of sleep. The first thing she noticed was that there was a lot of black smoke in the real world too.

 

* * *

 

“UGHHH,” Magica groaned, opening a window to let the vapor out. “How am I supposed to regain my powers and exact my grim vengeance if none of the magic shops in Duckburg have the proper ingredients? I couldn't even bake a sentient evil cake with this rubbish!” 

She took the boiling pot off the stove and dumped it into the sink. The inky goo made a crackling sound as it slid down the drain, as if it were slightly electrified. The witch then opened a cabinet and took out several fancy looking bottles, which were much more aesthetically pleasing than the empty ones which were strewn across the counter. 

“And to think that whelp Lena wanted to get rid of these,” Magica said to herself as she admired the potions. “She never did appreciate the difference between mediocre hocus pocus and top shelf sorcery. Maybe if she had cared a little more about the family business I wouldn't have banished her back into the endless shadowy void I so graciously dragged her out of.”

She uncorked an angular crystalline vial filled with a sickly green fluid and blissfully breathed in the aroma that wafted from the opening. Nearly anyone else would gag at the smell, but for an experienced witch it was heaven.

“Ahh, gorgon’s blood. Just a few drops of this and I could turn old Scroogey into a tasteful courtyard statue! …if I had a courtyard. And some way to get Scrooge to drink it. And… well, whatever.”

She sighed and put the stopper back in the bottle, placing it on the counter beside a large obsidian beaker shaped like a crow. “So many curses and concoctions, so few practical applications. Let's face it Magica, you got way too attached to that Sumerian amulet and now you're totally out of touch with the down-to-earth toil and trouble stuff.”

She picked up another vial, this one filled with pickled eyes which looked back at her as she observed it.

 

“Hey,” Lord Dominator said loudly enough for the witch to hear, which startled her so badly that she nearly dropped the vial, fumbling with it for a few seconds before actually catching it. “Can a girl get some flarpin’ water over here?”

“Oh!” Magica said, turning around to look at her guest on the couch. “I thought you were in a coma. Pity, I was planning on selling your body to a wealthy UFO enthusiast or something. But now that you’re awake, I suppose I’ll have to find another use for you.”

“I’m not gonna be useful to anyone if I die of dehydration,” Dominator replied, her throat scratchy and voice hoarse. “Besides, who do you think you’re talking to? You know who I am, right? You can’t just-”

“I can do anything I want, you ungrateful slug!” Magica said, putting her hands on her hips. “You may have been somebody in whatever galaxy you're from, but you're in MY apartment, on MY sofa, because I figured you MIGHT be a decent weapon to use against my arch nemesis. If I'm wrong I can just put you back where I found you though, no big deal.”

Lord Dominator attempted to yell something in response, but all she could muster was a weak cough. As she saw how pathetic and weak the alien looked, Magica realized that she in fact probably did need water pretty badly. The witch rolled her eyes and got out a glass, filling it with tap water. She brought it over to Dominator and handed it to her, watching as her guest eagerly gulped it down.

“So, how do you destroy planets exactly?” Magica asked as soon as Dominator finished drinking. “I'm guessing it's some kind of space magic, considering how your physique is so… soft.”

The villainess considered throwing her glass at the other woman, but quickly rationalized that she would need to cooperate at least a little if she wanted to get anywhere in the dumb world she was stranded on.

“I don't use magic, I'm a genius. I built an entire army of cool killer robots, figured out how to power them all with a plentiful resource that no one else found a use for, constructed invincible battle armor and a giant space cruiser-”

“Hang on,” Magica interrupted. “You built an army? By yourself? How long did that take?”

“A few decades or whatever,” Dominator said testily. “But that doesn't matter because I was totally unstoppable and it all paid off when I destroyed that stupid galaxy!”

“And then somehow you lost it all and crashed here in Duckburg. Yeah, sooo unstoppable.”

“THAT WAS A COMPLETE ACCIDENT,” Dominator shouted, before collapsing into a coughing fit. Magica sighed, took the glass from her hand, and went to fill it up.

“Since you don't have an army, or armor, or anything at the moment really, I'm having a hard time thinking how could you possibly be a threat to anyone, let alone Scrooge McDuck,” the witch said as she returned with more water and handed it to the other woman, who impatiently grabbed it from her hand. “I'd hoped you would be able to help me obliterate his mansion and this wretched town he loves so much, but now I'm thinking that selling your organs might be the best option here.”

“I don't need anybody- I mean anything, to destroy someone,” Dominator replied, hoping that Magica didn't notice her Freudian slip. “I bet I could take out this McDuck loser you keep babbling about with my bare hands.”

 

The first response she got was a loud, condescending laugh. 

“Your bare hands? You think you could defeat SCROOGE MCDUCK in combat? The duck who bested gods in athletic feats, hunted monstrous animals in the deepest jungles of the world, and managed to subdue ME without even using magic? Ooh, I get it now! You're not a cosmic conqueror, you're just some sad deluded girl who hit her head too hard when she fell to earth!”

Dominator stood up suddenly, startling Magica, who backed up into and then proceeded to trip over a chair.

“I’m done talking. Heal me with your lame magic and I’ll show you how serious I am,” she said.

“My magic is not ‘lame’!” the witch replied indignantly, quickly getting up from the floor and brushing dust off her black dress. “Fortunately I happen to have a rare and valuable potion that will cure all of your injuries and ailments at once, but it’s going to cost you.” 

Dominator watched intently as Magica briskly walked over to the counter where she had set her potion collection. She didn’t know a lot about magic, and she definitely didn’t trust the sorceress whose apartment she was currently trapped in. “What’s the catch? Are you gonna try to turn me into a sentient inanimate object, or a weird little animal or something?”

“Don’t be so macabre, Dommy. All I need you to do is promise you’ll help me exact my sumptuous revenge on Scrooge, and that you won’t doublecross or hinder me in any way. If you’re so confident that you can take down history’s greatest adventure capitalist it should be a no-brainer, really.”

The witch held out a pink fizzling concoction in a slender crystal beaker, dangling it in front of Lord Dominator’s face. She inspected the liquid with some apprehension, it smelled like it was going to melt her guts instead of heal her. Still, she was in a lot more pain than she would like to admit, and the idea of being instantly rejuvenated was tempting. Besides, since when did a bad guy keep her promises? 

“It’s a deal,” Dominator said, grabbing the potion and chugging it down in a single swig. It tasted like battery acid, but as soon as the serum hit her stomach she could feel her cracked bones return to their normal state. Her fever completely disappeared, and all her scrapes and bruises faded away in the blink of an eye. She hadn’t felt this good since before her disastrous final battle in that galaxy so far away.

“HA!” the alien yelled as she flexed her newly reborn muscles. “Thanks for the medicine, sucker! Now I’m gonna go find some parts, build a new suit of armor, and totally trash this dumb world!”

Dominator took two steps towards the door before falling flat on her face, as pain even worse than when she had crashed on earth flooded her body. “Ow! What the Grop is happening!?”

Magica chuckled as she loomed over her guest, her bill split open in a wicked smile. “Oh, sorry, did I forget to mention that any promises made before the ingestion of the potion are magically binding? If you try to walk out on our deal, all the injuries that I healed will return to you tenfold. Which, I’m pretty sure you can figure out, will hurt a lot.” 

“You tricked me! ME! That’s... actually kind of impressive,” Dominator said, shakily getting to her feet. As the idea of leaving the apartment left her mind, the pain subsided. “Okay fine, let’s go kill your enemy so I can spend as little time as possible under this extremely uncool, yet admittedly kind of clever, curse.”

“Ooh… we can’t really do that today,” Magica replied, averting her eyes from her reluctant new ally. “Scrooge is out on an adventure and he’s probably not getting back until the day after tomorrow. And before you ask, yes I do closely monitor his every action using a scrying spell I have to perform in the sink because I haven’t found an affordable cauldron yet.”

“...Alright. I wasn’t gonna ask that, but whatever. What are we gonna do until then?”

Magica shrugged and then gestured to a box with a screen on it in the corner, covered with tangled up wires and cables. “Do you know how to set up a TV?”


End file.
